You Might be a Redneck Pole Vaulter

[Tim McMichael]

If you have actually named the rat that lives under the pit.

If you have an intimate understanding of why it is not a good idea to pole vault naked.

If you have a hard time holding onto a pole because of a catfish bite.

If you don't change the tape because the blood stains tell you exactly where to put your grip.

[volteur]

apart from laughing out loud on my own too many times already i didn't laugh too much at this one "If you have a hard time holding onto a pole because of a catfish bite." until i also read this:

"To begin, a noodler goes underwater to depths ranging from only a few feet to up to twenty feet, placing his hand inside a discovered catfish hole. If all goes as planned, the catfish will swim forward and latch onto the fisherman's hand" ...

"Most noodlers have spotters who help them bring the catfish in, either to shore or to their boat. When a catfish bites onto a noodler, it holds on for quite a while." ...

"With some of the biggest fish caught weighing in at up to 50-60 pounds, very few noodlers are strong enough to attempt noodling by themselves. Although carrying the fish after they have been subdued is not difficult, trying to secure a fish and remove it from one's hand at the same time can be a challenge" (wiki)

seriously have to wonder about some of the craziness that goes on in the US

[Tim McMichael]

If one of the hardest things to adjust to when you were a kid was having to pole vault with shoes on.

If one of the reasons your grip on the pole is so secure is that you grew up milking cows by hand.

If you once missed two weeks of practice because of a fight you had with a cow in the milk barn. (When a large animal goes insane in a small space you tend to get crushed up against the wall and kicked a lot.)

[Tim McMichael]

If your runway changes levels more than twice.

[rhsvaulter]

As soon as deer season starts you no longer have a coach.
This part is all too true for me.

[PoleVaultinPsychic]

haha the "If you don't change the tape because the blood stains tell you exactly where to put your grip." is so true for me! and another girl on my team...

if when you get the "good" pits out you sink in and are virtually encased in them.
if you have used a bunjee cord for a crossbar and got hit with your pole anyway (true story )
when you have one helmet for the whole team that no one's seen since last season and everyone denies being the last one with it
if your coach is a senior on your team and no heights in a varsity meet...(yeah...it happened)
if before practice you have to find something to mop out the box because it's filled with water and all you have is pre wrap and your clothes...(not fun)

[Tim McMichael]

If the street vault at the town fair turned into a disaster because it happened after the catch-the-greased-pig contest.

[birdi_gurlie]

...if half the vaulters on your team miss practice on Thursdays because they have shooting team practice.
[Truly happened...okay, not half, but 3 of us missed it sometimes.]

Your standards are medical tape white. OR your coach has to take the standards apart because they've rusted so much, they won't move.
[Yeah, really happened...though not anymore...my coach took them apart and re-screwed them and its all good now...and we have nicer lowers because one of the other vaulters made some new ones.]

[Tim McMichael]

If someone tells you the best thing to warm up a sore muscle is Ben Gay, and you wonder how a pulled hamstring could possibly be related to sexual preference.

If you think the wind blows so hard in Oklahoma because Kansas blows and Texas sucks. (Apologies to Huffman, Manson, Payne and Pursley, all of whom handed me my head in competition more times than I can count.)

An aside: There was a pretty good vaulter from Texas back in the late 80’s, I forget his name, but he was in the mid 17’s and trying to make it to the next level. He was one of the most redneck vaulters ever. He had the long scraggly mullet and shaggy beard, uniform that looked like it had been washed about once a month, and personal hygiene to match. Anyway, he was standing in line warming up for the big Oklahoma City indoor meet right in front of Scott Huffman. He turned around and gave Scott a kiss full on the lips, picked his pole up and ran down the runway like nothing had happened.

[birdi_gurlie]

...if your mat cover is in 3 pieces and you're STILL attempting to cover the pit with it.

[skyin' pimp]

[quote="achtungpv"]
If you're a chick and you've vaulted while pregnant.


2 years ago a vaulter i coached took 3rd at the DII nationals pregnant. damn near won it

[skijmpnvaulter]

If after breaking a pole you stood up to several spectators with guns drawn because someone else fired the first shot